Honestly, it was not easy to admit that I have a mental health problem. I did not even consider looking at myself as an addict because I believe that the things I do are in control. I understand that there are consequences for what I do. But I never came to realize that I could lose everything in an instant. I firmly believed that my enthusiast for gambling is somehow comparable to a hobby. Little did I know it was entirely the opposite of what I thought it used to be.
It Fast-Forwarded Time
As I got stuck in the mentality of “living life to the fullest,” I intended to spend all my time into gambling leisure. I thought I was getting an exemption by wasting my time because of the idea that I need to be happy doing things that I enjoyed the most. With that type of perception, I never entirely care about anything else aside from the momentary enjoyment and thrill I experienced with gambling. But then, the realization hit me so hard that it was already too late to realize that I lost a lot of time in different casinos. With that, the last thing I know is that I am now old and broke. Therefore, I realized Karla Helbert, LPC, E-RYT, C-IAYT when she says, “Putting things in perspective and treating yourself with love and compassion can be such a gift.”
It Destroyed My Marital Relationship
Yes, it was fun gambling with friends. I honestly enjoyed spending moments together with the people who supported my gambling addiction. For me, it was a perfect life. However, I was too focused on the particular habit that I ignored essential people in my life. I lost communication with my wife. I never knew I was slowly pushing my family away from me. I was not aware that I am putting myself in a box and shutting down the only person who honestly wants to save me from the psychological condition I experienced. I ruined my marriage. Now I guess psychiatrist Dr. Henrietta Bowden-Jones was right after all when she said, “Families suffer terribly from gambling. They lose homes, the kids become depressed. This is not the worst case by any means.”
It Made Me Hate Myself
Again, I was too focused on giving myself the life I have always dreamed of, regardless of the consequences that I knew could happen. Honestly, I somehow understood that gambling would soon take me into my doom. But then, I chose not to pay much attention to that. But after I lost a lot of money, time, and energy, I began to hate myself. I hated myself for not winning consistently, and I hated myself for not being able to control the mental condition.
How It Changed My Life
My gambling addiction became worse over time. It ended up destroying my fortune, my relationships with people, as well as my overall health. It became something I valued more than anything else. As a result, it took everything away from me. Yes, this may seem a bit exaggerated, but it is the truth. I now do not have a stable financial income, I do not have someone to support me, and I do not know if the time left if enough to make me change things. Gambling is not and never will become comparable to a hobby like what I used to believe in. It is a mental condition. So if you are in the least same situation as mine, consider asking for professional help immediately. “Not everyone who gambles has a problem with it. It is important to determine whether or not the other person has an addiction,” says Natalia S. David, PsyD.